All Rights Reserved

The marriage/commitment season is on. All around me suddenly I find the people older, my peer group & many younger ones too getting committed left right & center!

Feel I'm the only one left out.
Really can't complain on that though, as it's been my choice to wait for the one whom I'll feel sure & happy to part with my 'All rights reserved' tag which I'm protective about.
It also brings the favorite follow up question that any singleton faces:
"So, when are you giving the good news." [Good news, as in getting hitched...not the traditional "good news" thankfully!! ;D ]

I have nothing against the question, except that sometimes people ask in such a way that one feels one has committed blasphemy by remaining single!
Am I choosy or am I NOT choosing well enough..or is plain destiny at work?

Often I feel like asking the ones who ask me, what are the deciding factors one should get married on; but I know few's version is going to go with mine & thus their lack of my understanding & my lack of their sensibilities for settling for someone, makes me jot down what would be the factors for which my All Rights Reserved tag, that I'm in control of now, can be forsaken.

All Rights Reserved. Such a nice ring it has to it. Of Independence & of exclusivity. Once parted, the term shall not be in use anymore. So, doesn't a little more thought go in whom I part it for?

To begin from the beginning. Why does one wish to get married?

To fulfil an obligation? To find security? to take care of a duty? to live upto our parents expectation? To follow a social norm? To procreate? to get rid of loneliness? To prove we are responsible citizens...?

OR

Because we find someone we wish to get married to? wish to belong to? becoz we found the one whom we wish to settle down with, somebody who we can make a home with, who believes in the similar value system of life, who shares our general common sensibilities? whom one can respect for the person they are? to get home to somebody special everyday... the one whom we are/could stay in love with?

Really, what are the factors one looks for when deciding on such a huge life changing decision?
The first seems practical & commonly followed & the second is heartful & thoughtful.

The most common norm is, becoz we found someone who is good natured, nice, honest, pleasant looking, from a nice family...the usual "good things."

Those are the typical traits one comes out with. Nothing at all wrong with that, except, honestly, how does one come to know the truth of all this? Except for trusting the given facts.
Good natured & nice everybody usually is at the beginning...coz we Do NOT have anything to differ on in the beginning of knowing someone. Lookswise - looks are perceptive. What is my beauty may not be someone else's. Nice family - Sure in India we get married to the family too.. yet I do personally believe that even if the family is good, that cannot be a criteria to say yes. People are distinct individuals.. & ultimately one marries an individual. Family is very important, but not as important than the person in question himself.
Also, listening to the heart is very important for me. Heart does give bad reality checks but it says the truth, if you hear honestly.

Apart from these, a very important trait would be, a desire to be with someone who believes in the word "marriage", "commitment" & the life sequels following the decision.

Ummm..Tough!!; Isin't it to find all this easily? So, even though the single tag gets over bearing at times, my grounded head reminds me of my belief system & then my current independence doesn't seem that bad. :D

Till destiny does not part with its cards, I'll trust I'm in control of the choosing part. :)
For I am a conscious, thinking & evolved person. & my All Rights would go to someone special only!
Wish me luck. :)

© Except for image, all rights reserved with Biraj 3Vedi. To re-print, prior permission required from the author.