Change...

"........ Change yourself!" - Whenever I hear something like this, my eyes roll up in exasperation. The sound of it is so negative.

To me it actually means, 'reject yourself & become someone else.'

Now, I don't mean that change is bad, nor do I oppose it; its just that the change we expect in people is something I don't agree much with.

Change is inevitable & a required part of growing up.. of learning... of life. It happens & comes naturally.

I am of the belief that things can be changed, situations can be changed... but people must be accepted for what they are.

People progress gradually & by their own will to grow. It should not be by efforts* & surely not because someone is pinpointing them to it.**

But when people expect you to undertake change because, they have a different take on your personality or if it doesn't suit them, its no good.

To take efforts to change self is like waging a war, Its a battle in which you are constantly struggling with your inherent nature. Its like we are forever looking for something else within us that we do not possess.

I believe in acceptance. To me, Accepting means acknowledging.

I find its much better to accept & work around self. This is so much more easier than to keep an ongoing war.

Everybody is born with an inherent nature & we are moulded accordingly. & then later we also mould ourselves by the understanding we have of life around us.

Why not enhance life by working around our traits & learning how to balance it; rather than reject it outrightly?

What is needed is the 'CHANGE OF ATTITUDE' that we have towards ourselves, towards people. Guess that is one change we can do with. Wouldn't we?

Think about it.

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[* - There are exceptions for this..as there are certain situations where changes become mandatory than necessary; to be made.
** - Only people who are the closest to you can ask you that. If its coming from them, pay heed.]

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Ruins... or Ruined?

Had been to the Kolampak (Kulpakji) Jain temple last gone Sunday for an outing. Its around 75kms. & a good 2.5 hrs drive from the city.

With not many options left nearby the city limits, thought its good to pay God a visit once in a while too. :P
As it was really long since the last time I'd been there, almost 7-8 years; I was pleasantly surprised to see the change in the temple's surroundings. It's been expanded & beautifully done with all the intricate marble work & all...& also maintenance of neat surroundings. Temples always manage to get donors. We are such bound by faith. [That makes me think of how I support privatisation in many places....err...let me not get deviated.]

Had good darshan & had yummm prasad within the premises. [Whoever misses that!?! :D]Thankfully it was peaceful with not many people though it was a weekend.

The only source of entertainment there are the Tanga rides (Horse cart) just outside the temple. We too went for a ride & our cart man asked us if we would like to visit a nearby museum.

Having never heard of it, we assumed it would be a chota-mota museum with some history about the temple. Anyways, since we were there, we decided to visit.
As we reached the museum through an almost non existent track. (No roads there) I was shockingly surprised.

It was a really old stone structure, which was converted into a museum & temple. As we parked, my shock turned into disbelief & dismay at the unusual state of management of such a beautiful edifice.

As expected, but for the pandits, beggars & stray dogs, there were no visitors there. Though I was most surprised at the presence of a decent number of beggars at this forlorn place. Is there any place spared by them?

Getting further, once we were in, fresh greens greeted us. Thankfully those were well maintained.

There is a main Shiv temple in the premises, which is worshipped & there are couple of adjacent temples in the premises too...but those didn't need worshipping.
The people who manage the place were maybe told by God, not to keep those temples in good order. I can think of no other appalling reason for the sad upkeep of those temples. It was a very contrasting & horrid fact to look at.

Apart from the temples, there were a lot of old stone idols lined up, from different eras. Idols upto the 10Th century A.D. Yet, none of these could be related to any kind of history as there was no information about any kinds regarding these relics. It seemed as if they were all amassed together & placed at the nearest given site.

The whole place mostly constituted of stone pillars & with craftsmanship that would give a peek to the quality of work in those times.

Looking at this it makes me believe that there must be so many more places like this all over our country, places which are just left off to the care of handful of people, with no proper maintenance & most importantly no apt promotion of it.

India has such a vast & dissimilar culture from region to region, that if well maintained, our past treasures can fill up our national vaults with enough wealth. Moneywise & heritagewise.
I truly believe:
The way we represent our history shows the way, what our future will be like.

Except these mundane observations, I was very glad to have chanced upon this comely place. History is always very arresting for me, I love to learn about cultures & time periods. So, even though there was no much information on it, I did absorb into the beauty of the stone pieces which had stories of their own.

After spending quite some time there, we proceeded towards home, only to find the weather so beautiful, that the Bhongir fort that is on the way, made my quest for historical sights only deeper & we stopped by for a while.
Like in a race, we zoomed upto the fort, said, 'Yipee, we climbed up in record time' ; & then zoomed down again as dusk was falling & we had to yet almost a couple of hours to reach home.

Yet one thing that stayed with me was: Why are most historic places not well maintained & why are they not well promoted... provided sufficient information on?

Is it that becoz as we are advancing towards more & more fast lives, either the Govt. deems it unnecessary to update these places..or is it coz they as well as we, aren't plain bothered?

'Aren't plain bothered', can't be the case as we spend a bomb on archaeological findings all the time. Only to be left off like this?

Then am I correct in my observation that they are not 'Ruins' but 'Ruined' in fact?

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Reflections

It makes you sleep dreamily at nights, it makes you alive by free breathing, it makes your days fly, it gives you infinite mirthful joy, it makes you look forward to each new day, life becomes a breeze, every effort is worthwhile...

& it does not let you do anything without the constant content presence & realization of it.

*

It does not let you sleep at nights, it does not let you breathe deeply, the days seem to stretch beyond endurance, you are choked when you try to laugh heartily, it does not want you to face the days, life seems a task you have to endure, every effort a torment...

& it does not let you do anything without the constant afflictive presence & realization of it.

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Two sides of the same book. The content evolves by the pages unfolded giving the two sides two different reflections.
The euphoria & anguish of love is such that can negate the whole logic of logics.

No matter if you agree, no matter if you don't. No matter what you do, no matter what you don't. No matter how hard you try, no matter even if you don't. You can't escape it.

It's there & it comes atleast once in each one of our lives. Lucky are the ones who don't see heartbreak & luckier are the ones who are blessed to find it more than once.

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One Day.

"You know, I'll surely get that One day..."

"One day I'm going to visit & surprise them... "

"I'm surely building my own home One day..."

"I'm going to own that car One day.."

"I see myself in that place One day..."

"This is something I wish to achieve One day...."

"I'm going on that Trip One day..."

" I'll make time for running that marathon One day.."

"I'll tell him....One day."

Sounds familiar? This 'One day' is such an intrinsic part of our lives.

It proves the fact that life is about dreams, dreams & more dreams. They never end. Its like the glue which keeps the soul stuck to this material world. Otherwise we'd attain renunciation. :D

Since the time we start realising our passions & our choices for the life we'd love to live, we always dream of getting on the road we would like to live on...(but which seems not possible at the moment) to the mystifying, "ONE DAY."

Though some dreams are achievable, we push them them ahead due to procrastination. & for the others,

We do not know where to place THAT ONE DAY in the plan of our life.

How often do we actually reach that "One day" is something we lose sight of more often than not.
Also, too often, time passes away & the season to pursue that 'One day' becomes a lost dream.. like a piece of wrinkled paper carried in our wallets for too long.

Then either the way is past long gone to pursue them or the zeal within us has dimmed. [Oh, don't tell me that anything can be started anytime; I won't be dreaming to run a marathon at the age of 60. Not because maybe I can't..but its stupid to risk it when I could have planned better.]

Life is so full of immediate things that we forever keep pushing away our desires on distant hopes..telling ourselves, let these immediate few things get attended to in our life, then we'll plan for that big dream we are seeing.

These 'few things' happening in our lives will never end & thus taking us far way from the mirage called 'One day.'

Until we don't realise that; that it is not a mirage, we will end up with a wishlist of unfulfilled dreams & desires..many of which could have been attained.

"Life is waiting", is a lovely line from the movie- 'The Terminal.' I'd like to add to this lovely line:

Life is waiting...'Why am I?'

Maybe this check up is just what the doctor ordered right now. I'm on my way to following it. Are you starting too?

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Lost Generation

Discovered this video on youtube...& fell in love with it.

More than just Me...! [?]

Since the time I had started blogging under this title....somehow I always ended up grimacing.
It kept coming back to me that, - what does 'More than just me..!' exactly mean?

Does it mean that I shall not be pouring out the details of my vain self only? or does it mean that I shall be sharing topics which I feel about...apart from myself.
Or does it also mean that by writing so, I'll be keeping a lid on my irrepressible need to harp about myself? :P
But whatever it may be, Thing is that- it is "ME" out there..these are my opinions...my definitions, my take on things! So, how does it not become 'More than just Me' ?

Hmmm... This is called contradicting self ... Or is it? Maybe, I should be good to myself & say , I'm correcting myself. :P
Whatever it may be, So I went ahead to do just that. i.e. - to correct myself.
'More than just me...!' has officially changed name to - 'Notes on My Wall...' [Kindly welcome the re-christening. :D]

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Pyaar se zyaada..

While watching a movie today, something in it caught my attention.
The leading lady having been separated with her husband, was being counselled by her sister to get back with her husband.
While counselling, done -to - death typically the sister asks: "Pyaar se zyaada bhi kuch hai...?"
& assuredly, the heroine was speechless with the chronic melodramatic background music in place [Baaaaahh!!] ; for her to think & give out suitable facial expressions marking her sudden realisation of whatever... [:O !!!]
Thankfully I had no such special effects & could definitaly put out a better reply immediately.

- Nahi, pyaar se zyaada shayad kuch nahi, par pyaar se kam bhi kuch cheezein nahi.
Love is above everything..above all, but there are a few things which are if not more, but sure on par to love.

Respect is the topmost of them. If love is a fire, respect sure is the kindle to keep it going. If mutual respect is missing in love, then it is like having a cot to sleep but with no mattress on it....The relation is there...but not quite.

Passion is another. Passion for the relation, passion for one another & passion to keep it alive.

Communication. A healthy relation can never work out if there is a communication gap between partners. Communication binds the relation like a binder binds scattered pages into a book.

Silliness. Silliness is silly! Silliness is fun. A relation cannot survive well on a serious notes only. Playfullness brings about a comfort level, which keeps the couple & the relation young.

These are the basic most important ingredients for the food called love to stay alive, fresh & healthy always.
It maybe difficult to get the right balance of all of the above ingredients in one, but not impossible. The sweet & sour imbalances create opportunities to enhance the tempering to the relation.
& Don't we wish, hope & believe that we will create that, when we find That first step for all this - Love?

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